About early childhood years and youth:
In childhood, the most important years in relationship with parents are the ones the child cannot talk their language still. Why? Let us look into an example.
When a child plays, you take away his toy and the baby cries in our “adult” language we would try to talk in a strict matter why he can not play that life is no game etc. we are talking on a stressful frequency the society is commonly known for. Now, on a pretty high possibility, the child will cry. So we could argue that in our “adults society mind” someone who cries has to “get their shit” together, be strong and move on. Because that is what adult, mature people do right?
Totally wrong.
The child will not think that. The child will feel that their tears and pain do not matter. This communication happens in a much deeper, non verbal level. This could later reflect in the fact that young adults feel not enough and seek to be enough in a society that is empty in itself. Maybe you have experienced in life that around some people you flourish? You feel more confident? More accepted? More happy? That is exactly the non verbal communication on a deeper level. The mere act of them being empowers you. In most times, the parents how ever cause rather other emotions. So we have two ways: have or be the parents to communicate in this level or truly understand this matter when we are older and communicate it back to parents and the beings we love around us.
Even a further thought:
The above problem could actually explain a lot of human reactions… children, young people that have this mis-communication from older humans which normally are parents do not create a student — teacher role in a positive sense but rather escape from this relationship and seek acceptance in their peers.
What happens then? They find peers that have the same fracture. Result could be gangs, violent groups etc. The absence of an adult or parent as a healthy teacher can be a huge impact in the problems we have today in society. Social media actually could impact this much deeper since now peer groups are bigger, easier to find.
We should seek and have the responsibility to not create a Authority relationship with our children , we should seek to create a teacher — disciple relationship. A disciple wants to listen, learn and follows you and in a final mastery overcomes the master but with love and respect and gives back the good. As Nietzsche writes in the prologue of Ecce homo: “An disciple only thanks the teacher badly if he stays an apprentice forever.”
Let’s build disciples and not traumatised obedient worker with anxiety disorder.
